life making sense....last year when I realized that I am likely have an ASD my entire life kind of made sense and now that I reflect back on the fact that I also grew up with a tumor in my right frontal/temporal lobe (putting pressure on/displacing my hypothalamus, amygdala, and hippocampus) my entire life makes sense...I am just not sure if my life experiences are a result of the tumor or ASD and believe that it is likely a combination. I decided to list the various functions associated with the brain (as described inhttp://www.womensinternational.com/connections/cognition.html)and connect them to my life experiences.>decision making planning Temporal Lobe Memory Emotion Hearing Language< Amygdala< Emotions >Social Behavior Hypothalamus >Homeostasis< temperature caloric intake  Hormones ontrol of hormone release from the pituitary gland >short term memory ...maybe this was not such a good idea....I mean it's nice to kind of understand why I had such difficulties..any how whenever "life" just became/becomes too overwhelming and I feel like an incapable failure I shut myself down from the world and focus on what I can control (food, exercise, weight), and this just happens over and over again because I just can't function like a normal person....I just don't understand how I can be so smart but so inept at activities of daily life that other people do automatically and never give it a second thought.....even if I were to actually, by some miracle , get into a PhD program will I be able to handle it? My brain just doesn't work like everyone else's and this is especially true following a life of who know how many unrecognized temporal lobe seizures and a craniotomy....is all the effort that I am putting into applying to PhD programs just a waste of time? What should I be doing with my life? what am I capable of doing?